35.

for years, i have selected a word as my personal theme. at 34, my word was calm. i think i nearly mastered it. for 35, i chose: surrender.

the art of surrender isn’t defeat, giving up or powerlessness. to surrender is choosing acceptance over resistance, appreciation over expectations and flexibility over foolishness.

as someone who has historically struggled with needing to be in control, i knew this wouldn’t be an easy feat. even still, i was also confident i could remain calm when things became turbulent. the universe has a funny way of testing us as my life more or less blew up at the start of february. luckily, i had a trip to the dominican republic with 20 of my favorite humans to planned. i highly recommend getting people together to celebrate your trips around the sun in big and small ways.

reuniting with the girls after check-in

when traveling with groups, i believe in a balance of planned fun and leisure time. i asked everyone to be at a cocktail party —> dinner one night and invited anyone interested on a boat for a sunday funday. any other time, i would send a broadcast via paperless post so people knew where to find me at the resort. it was honestly so easy and there is nothing i love more than having so many of my loved ones in one place. below are some photos of those in between moments.

for the cocktail party and dinner, i asked everyone to wear black and/or white (as most have that in their closet). this was the first time all of us had been in the same place and it was such a blast.

and for the sunday funday on the boat, to say a time was had would be a gross understatement. there are three things that are ALWAYS worth saying yes to: a day on the water in the sunshine, an open bar and the additional cost for a photographer.

while there were hiccups with our travel agent, the resort was top notch, the weather was beautiful, the people present to celebrate me were extraordinary and the love i felt is immeasurable. arriving to the dominican republic already having the mindset of surrendering made the trip exponentially more enjoyable. when i think of the rollercoaster that 35 has been so far, surrendering was the only way to not just make it, but enjoy it.

i am already brainstorming for 36.

xoxo,

k. tap

happy 5th birthday, enzo!

this weekend, i had the pleasure of flying to washington to celebrate my nephew’s 5th birthday. anj (aka twin) planned an amazing day for her sweet boy.

enzo was so surprised to see me along with many friends and family members at a private screening of one of his favorite movies. seeing him jump with excitement as each new cluster of people arrived made my heart swell.

no one could have prepared me for the way my heart has doubled in size since he was born. hearing him ask if auntie k flew “all the way from california just for his birthday” nearly brought me to tears. naturally, i told him that birthdays are a big deal and a long as i can, i will be there for each of his parties.

i figured i’d take trip down memory lane and pick a photo from each year with auntie’s baby.

fall 2020 – our first meeting
summer 2021 – arizona
spring 2022 – washington
winter 2023 – washington
summer 2024 – hawaii
fall 2025 – washington

i saw this quote today and it hit the nail on the head.

“being an aunt is loving a tiny human that isn’t yours with all your heart.”

happy birthday to one of the brightest, funniest and most charismatic five year olds on earth. auntie k loves you to the moon and back.

xoxo,

k. tap

something about her

since before the sandwich shop even opened, brandi and i were committed to supporting two of our favorite vanderpump rules girlies. ariana and katie. with brandi living in texas, i held out until she could do a trip to california that would be long enough to have both time in the bay and in la. let me tell you – something about her is absolute perfection.

as if the quaint shop wasn’t delightful enough, the customer service provided to us and other patrons by the entire staff, including ms. terri (katie’s mom), was second to none. from the wonderful recommendations to the swift service to the warm welcome for this couple with a dog that had to weigh about 100 pounds, it was clear that something about her was a place where anyone would feel right at home.

i ordered the cameron and when i tell you i still dream about this sandwich, that is no exaggeration. it is the only item on the menu where substitutions aren’t allowed and trust me: you would not want to make any.

the cameron

the cameron comes with salami, capicollo, mortadella, smoked provolone, sun dried tomatoes, banana peppers, red onion, fresh basil, italian spices, pesto aioli and salt & pepper served on focaccia. if i were describing sandwich in a few words, i would say: decadent, fresh and flavor-packed!

the cameron – take two

brandi ordered the voila and when asked to describe it in a few words, she said: savory, perfect crunch, warm (since it’s one of the few warm ones on the menu) and delectable.

the voila

the voila comes with oven roasted turkey, smoked gouda, sun dried tomatoes, shaved cucumbers, red onion, sriracha aioli and salt & pepper grilled on their signature sourdough. 10/10 would recommend!

while the bread is to die for, don’t fret if you are gluten free. they have both gluten free bread options and are happy to make any of the sandwiches into bowls. there are also salads and every dressing is made fresh in house.

we may have initially sought out something about her because of our shared love of vanderpump rules and wanting to support a female owned and operated business, however we will return because it’s the best sandwich spot in la.

xoxo

k. tap

thought of the week: sisterhood

hi lovelies! i hope that your summer is off to a wonderful start. it is hard to put into words how good it feels to be able to tap into this creative side of mine.

my favorite day of the summer is july 24th and it has been since i knew what a calendar was because it is my godsister’s birthday. for those of you that are new here, crystal and i have been friends since birth (my mom convinced a few of her friends to have babies at the same time as her so i could have playmates). my mom is her godmother and her mom is mine. it only seems right for my first thought of the week in months to be about sisterhood – without crystal, i wouldn’t know the meaning of it.

february 1991 – crystal and i at my first birthday

“sisterhood is holding space for one another to be our full selves — whatever that looks like. messy or not. it’s loving each other while we figure life out.” -ashley hobbs

my godsister has had this magical way of meeting me exactly where i am. when we were kids, it came in the form of supporting my bizarre interests and hobbies (like playing in a competitive handbell choir). in our teens, it was being a place of refuge when i was feeling misunderstood and when it was time for me to go to college, it was making the trek up north to move me in. in our 20s, it was walking alongside me through grief, scary medical procedures and returning back to an la i didn’t recognize without my grandmother in it. in our 30s, it has been supporting me as i support others and encouraging me to prioritize myself unapologetically.

june 2023 – me and my godsister at her mom’s 60th

it hasn’t just been the dark times she has seen me through – it is the three hour facetimes filled with laughter, the dinners that turn into six hours together but feel like six minutes, the girls trips, the family parties, the celebrating every single win together as if we both hit lotto – my godsister reminds me daily that i am rich in sisterhood. thank you for loving me fully, even when i am messy.

how rare and beautiful to be loved exactly as i am while also being inspired to be better and better because of how magical she is.

september 2023 – my godsister and me at my mom’s 60th

happy 35th to my first ride or die – i love you so much, godsister.

who in your life has taught you about sisterhood? have you told her how much you love and appreciate her lately?

xoxo,

k.tap

kauai 2024

last year, one of my supervisors sent an email to our team offering up her condo in kauai as a way to offer some self-care to all the clinicians. instead of paying thousands of dollars for a week in paradise, we would simply pay the cleaning fee for the week. i was flabbergasted and knew i needed to take action immediately. i thought about who could best benefit from a week away and knew i needed to invite my twin, anj. we invited two of our girlfriends but as the youth say, life was lifin’ – they had to cancel. anj and i didn’t let that stop us from having a beautiful week in paradise with her son, enzo. getting to hawaii was far from easy for me with multiple delays and plane issues that required trekking through the airport to a new terminal all together before takeoff but once i landed, reunited with anj and enzo and saw that this was my backyard for the week, any travel exhaustion no longer mattered.

there is something extra magical about seeing a beautiful place through the eyes of a child. enzo is more knowledgeable about flowers and wildlife than almost anyone i know. even just the simplest walk to the pool would morph into a special moment for me.

we were fortunate to have a lengthy list of recommendations as multiple friends of ours have family in kauai and frequent the island. a beach that was a must was po’ipu. we made sure to stop at puka dogs to enjoy their unique hot dogs and fresh lemonade on the beach.

to say we were fortunate to have hanalei beach be in such close proximity to the condo is an understatement. that is where we spent the next few days.

outside of our time spent at the beach, we certainly had some favorite spots for a quick and fresh bite. hanalei poke was to die for. i also still dream about the shaved ice from wishing well. the flavor options are next level and the fact that there are organic options versus processed syrups is a game changer.

when we wanted a more upscale dinner, we traveled across the island to beach house restaurant. i’d highly suggest it and a reservation can be made on open table. tap on the link to read the full blog post about our dining experience. it was the one day we took the time to get dressed in something outside of swimwear.

there was something incredibly special about getting a tattoo to honor my grammy while there with one of my best friends who not only loved her (and was loved by her) dearly but walked alongside me through every stage of grieving her. i truly cannot thank twin enough for that. the libra club was the best tattoo shop i have ever stepped inside of. i immediately felt not just safe but comfortable. it felt like i was sitting in the living room one of my girlfriends. i am so grateful to hilly for recommending it.

for our final night on the island, we had dessert before dinner at jojo’s shaved ice (because wishing well was closed) before heading to the terrace restaurant and bar for dinner. enzo got to try shaved ice for the first time and i thoroughly enjoyed my calamari and poke nachos from the terrace.

while leaving the island proved to be chaotic (both because of sadness and because my preordered lyft/uber cancelled and the next ones i requested continued to cancel on me), i would go back in a heartbeat. kauai officially has a piece of my heart.

if you have an opportunity to travel with one of your best friends, the answer is yes. happy birthday, twin. i would go anywhere with you.

xoxo,

k. tap