Category: good reads

the grief workbook – grief tested, mourner approved!

it is no secret that i typically dread the month of may as i consistently feel overwhelmed with grief between the anniversary of my grandmother’s death paired with mother’s day. sometimes, it can feel all consuming. i am fortunate to have friends that make a conscientious effort to check in during this time. one that has done this consistently is gracelyn. this could be because she suffered a significant loss of her own a year prior (also in may). it could also be because she is one of the most empathetic humans i know. nonetheless, today, i am thrilled to share something with all of you that has already made my may a bit better – the grief workbook!

the grief workbook is something i know i will be filling out for the entire month, especially when i want to carve out space to reminisce about my grandmother. oftentimes, people are unsure about how they are feeling or don’t have a safe space to discuss their grief. this workbook is helpful with feeling exploration and is something that is as sacred as you want it to be.

i laughed. i cried. i smiled. i hugged a pillow. it is not lost on me that i am filling out this workbook from my late grandmother’s home (where papa still lives) while seated in her spot on the couch. may is typically an emotional rollercoaster. the page about a mixed bag of emotions helps to identify what those emotions are.

with me being such a music buff and grammy being someone who directed the church choir, i especially loved the page about creating a grief playlist. i am actually going to add this exact lineup to a spotify playlist this evening. it will be the theme of may.

sometimes, it is crazy to think of all that has happened since she transitioned. the page below really made me pause and give myself a pat on the back. the last four years haven’t been easy but they have certainly been filled with plenty of accomplishments i know she would be incredibly proud of.

have you thought about what your grief gold stars would be? do you carve out space to grieve at all?

with mother’s day being just around the corner, i know it can be a triggering time for many. rather than dodging the topic, i’d highly recommend getting this book for fellow grievers. you can find the book here.

xoxo,

k. tap

p.s. you may already be familiar with luna peak foundation from my blog post about their book for cancer thrivers, beyond remission – talk about inspirational!

more than enough

after grad school, i told myself i would get back into reading for pleasure. when there aren’t thousands of pages to plow through every 10 weeks, it is funny how you have the capacity to consume books for fun. during the pandemic, i asked my fellow bookworms for recommendations and this one came up over and over again. a couple of weeks ago, while in puerto rico for spring break, i finished a book by elaine welteroth that i am certain i will read again and again – more than enough.

first, this was an incredibly easy read. it felt like elaine and i were either exchanging stories at a boozy brunch or at a sleepover with girlfriends where you share your deepest and darkest secrets, hold on to the magical nuggets of wisdom that are dropped and laugh until your sides hurt. as a fellow black woman who was raised in california (and even did a 10 year stint in the bay), there was so much familiarity. elaine covers everything from imposter syndrome to being the only person in a space that was not created with you in consideration to colorism within the black community to navigating heartbreak to remembering not to shrink ourselves in an effort to make those around me more comfortable with their shortcomings.

there truly is something for everyone but a little something extra for those of us identifying as millennials, women, black, biracial or simply someone trying to shatter both ceilings and stereotypes. my top takeaways from the book were:

  1. own every piece of yourself unapologetically
  2. if you believe a space is for you, others will believe it is, too
  3. the dopest shit happens outside of your comfort zone
  4. there is a fine line between being dedicated to your work and your work being detrimental to your health – know the difference
  5. don’t be afraid to let your loved ones show up for you in times of need

something tells me that my upcoming thought of the week will be courtesy of elaine welteroth. i can’t wait to see what she does next.

xoxo,

k. tap

52 lists

earlier this year, i was gifted two separate care packages from extraordinary friends from boxfox. while there were a wide array of goodies, something both boxes had in common were journals. i noticed one journal looked similar to another i had been gifted for my birthday. it is as though my friends knew what i needed even when i didn’t.

let me introduce you to 52 lists by moorea seal…

outside of the journals being beautiful, something i love is that while you can easily do an entry per week since there are 52 lists in each book, there is no pressure if you miss a week because there are no dates printed in the journals. while i am nowhere near finished with each journal, in looking ahead at the prompts for the year, i loved each enough to gift to friends and have recommended both to clients on journeys to create calm and/or happiness in their own lives.

52 lists for happiness – weekly journaling inspiration for positivity, balance and joy is broken down into four parts: reflect, acknowledge, invest and transform. some of my favorite prompts are: list the best choices you have made in your life so far; list the things in your life you are actually able to control; list the ways that you think someone you love would describe you; list the people you want to spend more time with before the end of the year; list how where you are right now fulfills dreams and desires of your past.

52 lists for calm – journaling inspiration for soothing anxiety and creating a peaceful life is broken down into four parts, as well: be present, look back, move forward and release. some of my favorite prompts are: list the ways that you tend to feel stress in yourself body; list the songs that feel like comfort, peace, calm and rest; list all the people in your life that you have felt comfortable talking to and felt heard by; list the people you think of as your chosen family; list the things you would say to other people if you had the courage.

if looking for a way to treat yourself or an incredibly thoughtful gift to give to someone, you can find 52 lists for happiness and 52 lists for calm on amazon.

do you have either of these? if not, do you have any of the other 52 lists journals?

xoxo,

k. tap

52 lists

earlier this year, i was gifted two separate care packages from extraordinary friends from boxfox. while there were a wide array of goodies, something both boxes had in common were journals. i noticed one journal looked similar to another i had been gifted for my birthday. it is as though my friends knew what i needed even when i didn’t.

let me introduce you to 52 lists by moorea seal…

outside of the journals being beautiful, something i love is that while you can easily do an entry per week since there are 52 lists in each book, there is no pressure if you miss a week because there are no dates printed in the journals. while i am nowhere near finished with each journal, in looking ahead at the prompts for the year, i loved each enough to gift to friends and have recommended both to clients on journeys to create calm and/or happiness in their own lives.

52 lists for happiness – weekly journaling inspiration for positivity, balance and joy is broken down into four parts: reflect, acknowledge, invest and transform. some of my favorite prompts are: list the best choices you have made in your life so far; list the things in your life you are actually able to control; list the ways that you think someone you love would describe you; list the people you want to spend more time with before the end of the year; list how where you are right now fulfills dreams and desires of your past.

52 lists for calm – journaling inspiration for soothing anxiety and creating a peaceful life is broken down into four parts, as well: be present, look back, move forward and release. some of my favorite prompts are: list the ways that you tend to feel stress in yourself body; list the songs that feel like comfort, peace, calm and rest; list all the people in your life that you have felt comfortable talking to and felt heard by; list the people you think of as your chosen family; list the things you would say to other people if you had the courage.

if looking for a way to treat yourself or an incredibly thoughtful gift to give to someone, you can find 52 lists for happiness and 52 lists for calm on amazon.

do you have either of these? if not, do you have any of the other 52 lists journals?

xoxo,

k. tap

beyond remission – words of advice for thriving

i could not be more excited to share this book with each of you. my dear friend (gracelyn) and her aunt (melody, a cancer survivor), spent the last couple of years creating this work of art.

beyond remission – words of advice for thriving is an extraordinary collection of stories, photographs and advice from cancer survivors to those battling it now, those in remission and honestly, anyone who has been impacted by cancer. i cannot name a single person in my inner circle who has not been impacted my cancer in some capacity. can you?

this book is truly for everyone and has people from all walks of life represented – young, old, black, white, men, women and literally every kind of cancer you can think of. it shows how cancer does not discriminate but more importantly, it shows how beautiful life can be in spite of and/or after cancer. so frequently, stories around cancer are not told because it is a taboo topic. part of why this book is extraordinary is because gracelyn and melody dive in with each survivor. in this book, there is definitely a story for everyone and no two are the same.

this book was a labor of love and was made even more phenomenal due to melody being able to connect closely with the stories being told due to her own experiences acute lymphoblastic leukemia (which she dives into in the book). the vulnerability of melody and every single one of the participants in the book is nothing short of awe inspiring. there is an unreal amount of positivity weaved throughout the book and with my own study of gratitude and positive psychology, this is something that stood out to me. it is certainly a mindset and outlook we could all use a little more of.

it is hard to choose which quotes resonated with me the most but i tried to choose my favorite five:

1. never once did i consider not making a full recovery. -amy, breast cancer

2. i wanted no pity, just everyone’s love and support. -erika, breast cancer

3. surviving means remembering those who didn’t, and living every day of your life in search of why you did. -kyle, testicular cancer

4. for the first time in my life, i was open to leaning on people and feeling vulnerable, instead of always being in control. -kara, synovial sarcoma

5. each time i revisit my cancer journey, i am reminded of how far i’ve come and what a gift it is to be alive. -audrey, ovarian cancer

as if this book isn’t motivational and moving enough, gracelyn and melody are doing so much to give back to the cancer community through their foundation, luna peak. there are few things i love more than people giving back and women showing time and time again that they can rule the world.

to say i am honored to know gracelyn and proud to call her a friend would be a gross understatement.

you can get your hands on a copy of beyond remission – words of advice for thriving on amazon or barnes and noble.

the only regret i have is not ordering more than one copy because after reading, i know many survivors in my life would benefit greatly. i also have a dear friend currently battling lymphoma that explicitly stated how she wants to be surrounded by positivity – this book is full of it.

once you read it, tell me which quotes resonate most with you.

xoxo,

k. tap