a little leopard never hurt anyone

can you blame me for reminiscing about being on vacation after a 12 hour work day? while i normally love swim separates, this one piece from asos caught my eye in the fall (back when i thought i’d be spending the week before christmas in kauai).

it’s fun, it’s flirty and can easily be paired with a skirt or some shorts to create a little outfit.

i tend to gravitate towards swimsuits with wire/structure. while this one doesn’t have that, it does have this black belt that loops around just under the bust near the natural waistline. definitely adds a little something extra.

because i was more concerned with cocktail time than thinking of photos for my blog, i have included a couple from the actual website so you could see the suit in all its glory.

since this number is sold out, i have included a few of my favorite one pieces from asos.

1. this mixed print black and white number is to die for!

2. an all white ruffled one piece would be perfect for those bachelorette parties this summer

3. a sleek and sexy one piece in black? count me in.

4. florals for spring? groundbreaking.

xoxo,

k. tap

the grief workbook – grief tested, mourner approved!

it is no secret that i typically dread the month of may as i consistently feel overwhelmed with grief between the anniversary of my grandmother’s death paired with mother’s day. sometimes, it can feel all consuming. i am fortunate to have friends that make a conscientious effort to check in during this time. one that has done this consistently is gracelyn. this could be because she suffered a significant loss of her own a year prior (also in may). it could also be because she is one of the most empathetic humans i know. nonetheless, today, i am thrilled to share something with all of you that has already made my may a bit better – the grief workbook!

the grief workbook is something i know i will be filling out for the entire month, especially when i want to carve out space to reminisce about my grandmother. oftentimes, people are unsure about how they are feeling or don’t have a safe space to discuss their grief. this workbook is helpful with feeling exploration and is something that is as sacred as you want it to be.

i laughed. i cried. i smiled. i hugged a pillow. it is not lost on me that i am filling out this workbook from my late grandmother’s home (where papa still lives) while seated in her spot on the couch. may is typically an emotional rollercoaster. the page about a mixed bag of emotions helps to identify what those emotions are.

with me being such a music buff and grammy being someone who directed the church choir, i especially loved the page about creating a grief playlist. i am actually going to add this exact lineup to a spotify playlist this evening. it will be the theme of may.

sometimes, it is crazy to think of all that has happened since she transitioned. the page below really made me pause and give myself a pat on the back. the last four years haven’t been easy but they have certainly been filled with plenty of accomplishments i know she would be incredibly proud of.

have you thought about what your grief gold stars would be? do you carve out space to grieve at all?

with mother’s day being just around the corner, i know it can be a triggering time for many. rather than dodging the topic, i’d highly recommend getting this book for fellow grievers. you can find the book here.

xoxo,

k. tap

p.s. you may already be familiar with luna peak foundation from my blog post about their book for cancer thrivers, beyond remission – talk about inspirational!

thought of the week: discovering what you don’t want

when i was in both undergrad and grad school, there was an incredible focus on what did we want to do with all of this knowledge we had acquired. what were the next steps? how would we have an impact on society? what would be our lasting contribution? what do we want out of life? and yes, each of those are important things to think about. it certainly has helped steer me in the right direction. but still, there is something missing from that equation and elaine welteroth, author of “more than enough” (and total badass) hit the nail on the head.

“discovering what you don’t want is just as important as finding out what you do.” -elaine welteroth

as i prepare to take the next step in my career, i have come to realize that while i knew so much about what i wanted, i didn’t realize what i didn’t want until i did a true analysis of my current position alongside my future position. while i will do a deeper dive about this next step on my instagram live this sunday, just know that you are worth the investment it takes to discover both what you want and don’t want. and if you haven’t done so already, order a copy of “more than enough” here.

xoxo,

k. tap

summer is calling my name!

at the beginning of the month, i was fortunate enough to spend a week in puerto rico with some of the most wonderful humans i know. while a recap of the trip will likely be up eventually, i had to show you all one of my new swimsuits from old navy right now!

something i love is that you can mix and match them since they are sold as separates. and, if you are fuller on top or in the trunk, you can buy the size to accommodate that. old navy has tons of bathing suits that are inclusive in size.

i don’t know if it is because the weather forecast shows that it’s going to be in the 80s this weekend or if it is me being water obsessed but summer really is calling my name. i will be posting more suits soon. i hope everyone’s week is off to a solid start.

xoxo,

k. tap

more than enough

after grad school, i told myself i would get back into reading for pleasure. when there aren’t thousands of pages to plow through every 10 weeks, it is funny how you have the capacity to consume books for fun. during the pandemic, i asked my fellow bookworms for recommendations and this one came up over and over again. a couple of weeks ago, while in puerto rico for spring break, i finished a book by elaine welteroth that i am certain i will read again and again – more than enough.

first, this was an incredibly easy read. it felt like elaine and i were either exchanging stories at a boozy brunch or at a sleepover with girlfriends where you share your deepest and darkest secrets, hold on to the magical nuggets of wisdom that are dropped and laugh until your sides hurt. as a fellow black woman who was raised in california (and even did a 10 year stint in the bay), there was so much familiarity. elaine covers everything from imposter syndrome to being the only person in a space that was not created with you in consideration to colorism within the black community to navigating heartbreak to remembering not to shrink ourselves in an effort to make those around me more comfortable with their shortcomings.

there truly is something for everyone but a little something extra for those of us identifying as millennials, women, black, biracial or simply someone trying to shatter both ceilings and stereotypes. my top takeaways from the book were:

  1. own every piece of yourself unapologetically
  2. if you believe a space is for you, others will believe it is, too
  3. the dopest shit happens outside of your comfort zone
  4. there is a fine line between being dedicated to your work and your work being detrimental to your health – know the difference
  5. don’t be afraid to let your loved ones show up for you in times of need

something tells me that my upcoming thought of the week will be courtesy of elaine welteroth. i can’t wait to see what she does next.

xoxo,

k. tap