one of the many things that contributes to my house feeling like a home are candles. i’ve loved candles since i was a kid (likely because both of my parents are candle people as well). i love the cozy feeling a candle can create and how a scent can really change the vibe of a space. at the beginning of the year, my old supervisor wanted to commemorate our year working together and we talked about different activities we could do. when i mentioned loving candles, she brought up candle making. let me introduce you to: glow.
glow candle lounge
maybe you’ve heard of petroglyph? it’s a ceramic studio where you get to glaze a variety of pieces. glow is the sister studio. there is so much to love about glow. from the spacious and inviting studio to the extraordinary customer service to the variety of candles and scents that you get to choose from – there is truly something for everyone.
part of the studio glow associate wall of wax candles to create + pricing soy wax candles scents to choose from: floral, fresh, sweet + fruity, earthy
while i went with just one person in january, i hosted a birthday party for a dear friend here a couple of weeks ago. glow was able to comfortably accommodate a party of nine (i made a reservation to be safe since we were coming in on a saturday) and it was seamless. each of us were walked through a tutorial about how to build our candle and it was such a fun and relaxing experience.
i knew i was interested in a more layered look so i chose a candle mold and the appropriate number of tiles for said mold. i also selected some charms/decorations. i chose two champagne bottles to celebrate the end of the time with my previous boss. we had a lot to toast to so it seemed appropriate.
candle mold, wax, spackle and decorations breaking down the wax ready for the final step (pouring hot wax in to fill the spaces)this step is done by an associate
the following day, i swung by the studio to pick up our pieces. they turned out wonderfully!
final product!boss’s final product
when at glow a couple of weeks ago, some friends did soy wax candles and those were so cool as well. i not only loved the vessels, i was obsessed with the dried flowers added to each of their candles.
soy wax candles
glow is located in willow glen (in san jose, ca) on lincoln avenue. there are a ton of great restaurants on the street if you want to make a day out of it the way we did. glow also allows you to bring food in if you’d like to either bring something from home or pick up something from a nearby establishment. when i return this weekend, i will likely bring little snack plates for my girlfriends and i to tie us over until dinner.
i cannot recommend this place enough! and for those of you who are parents, it is definitely kid friendly.
if you choose to visit soon, don’t forget to let me know!
my favorite part of this holiday season was hosting some amazing women for a little holiday get together i called “christmas cocktails with kristin” – it was a blast! while typically not a christmas girlie, i wanted to create some festive spirit since i knew i’d be helping to care for my dad over thanksgiving week. it was the best decision i could have made. there is absolutely nothing wrong with creating your own joy.
my little tabletop tree
i found the cute little gift bags (filled with prizes for our game winners), the sign and the christmas candle at hobby lobby. while visiting anj in washington the week before, i was able to find the bulk of what i needed for the party for under $60! truly unreal.
mimosa bar with cranberry blood orange + white cranberry juice options; a holiday punch with cranberry, pineapple, vodka and club soda; red sangria with a cabernet and bourbon + white sangria with a sauvignon blanc and vodka
i love having options for beverages and know that people gravitate towards different things. i wanted the girls to be able to customize their mimosas – maybe you want a lot of juice or maybe you just want enough to change the color. with them being able to pour it themselves versus it being premixed, that was more than doable. a few of my friends get headaches from champagne/sparkling wine so i also did two sangrias and a spiked holiday punch. all were enjoyed!
hot cocoa bar with marshmallows, peppermint crunch, sprinkles, original whipped cream and peppermint whipped cream
for the girls looking for a cozy beverage or a little something sweet, the hot chocolate bar was a hit. while i prefer my hot chocolate with milk, i used this hot water dispenser instead because lactose is not everyone’s friend. the girls being able to add as little or as much cocoa as they wanted was definitely the move.
the girlies 🎄🥂
i wanted everyone to be comfortable so we all wore our favorite christmas pajamas. my little sleep shirt is from asos. while we couldn’t all fit on the photo wall at once, it definitely worked in pairs/trios. reens covered the wall in a festive wrapping paper the night before the party (along with making my place look more festive as a whole).
your therapists need to have fun, too! bagel bar, charcuterie boards and red velvet cupcakes
i like the idea of being able to graze, especially when not having formal place settings for each person. this allowed for just that.
christmas cookie decorating
the cookie decorating contest was hilarious and made me feel like a little kid again. i bought this set at target that included all pre baked cookies along with icing pens and sprinkles. we may or may not have borrowed some toppings from the hot chocolate bar for a little extra flair.
more than anything, i just loved having so many of my favorite women in one place. the holidays can be so tough, especially for those of us who have experienced a significant amount of grief and loss. this felt like a chance to make the holiday season feel more joyous and to do it on my own terms. 10 out of 10 would recommend if you are looking to reclaim the holiday season.
what was your favorite part about the holiday season? i hope that there was at least one part that made you smile like this.
hey! i hope each of you enjoyed your thanksgiving week (if you celebrate) and spent time with those you love most eating something absolutely delightful. thanksgiving looked different for me this year for a variety of reasons but primarily because i have been at the hospital around the clock with my dad, who underwent a stem cell transplant (expect a full rundown in the coming weeks about all of the many layers). one of the limitations is not being able to have any food that is not prepared at the hospital or by me in our hotel suite due to his nonexistent immune system. with him barely having tastebuds and being limited on what sits well on his stomach, there wasn’t the traditional thanksgiving dinner (filled with many of my favorite soul food dishes). maybe it is because i am craving a great meal out, missing my friends and feeling grateful to the many members of my chosen family that offered to have a thanksgiving spread delivered (before they knew about the restrictions), i found myself thinking about this phenomenal italian restaurant alan and i went to last month. let me introduce you to: cento.
alan had been RAVING about cento for months. we had been trying to go together but life was a little too chaotic AND for awhile, they were closed on mondays so we struggled a bit. let me tell you this – the wait was absolutely worth it. there was not a single thing we consumed that i would not give at least a 9.5 out of 10. let me walk you through our dining experience:
hamachi crudo endive caesar
the hamachi? melted like literal butter. the endive caesar? simple and flavor packed, especially with the hint of tarragon. one of the reasons alan is in my top five favorite people to dine with is because we have such similar palettes. it is an added bonus that the conversation is consistently captivating. that being said, we frequently get to sample more of the menu because we can share various dishes (like the two above). for our main courses, we both committed to pasta dishes.
spicy pomodoro bolognese
alan couldn’t get enough of his spicy pomodoro. he was surprised i didn’t order it because of my deep love for all things spicy however, i just couldn’t pass up a ricotta gnocchi with a 28-month parmesan and cream. i had zero regrets. because their menu is constantly changing, alan’s pasta above is not currently available however, my bolognese is so run to get your bowl!
we were between a few different options for dessert. one of the only areas where alan and i differ is there is no such thing as too much chocolate for him. that certainly is not the case for me. one that spoke to us both was the date cake and our server highly recommended it.
date cake a very belated birthday celebration 🤎
the date cake is something i literally dream about. who doesn’t love caramel, pecan and crème fraiche ice cream? alan had been to cento at least a dozen times and had never tried it. from now on, it is a MUST.
with me being a planner, there were bonus points given for being able to make a reservation, valet parking and being seated upon arrival (even though alan hadn’t arrived yet). i am already anxiously awaiting my next visit and cannot speak highly enough about the quality of service, the ambiance (would be a great space for a private event), the attention to detail with every dish and how heavenly the entire meal was from start to finish. if you find yourself in la, make a reservation at cento.
this year has been full of milestones – many of my nearest and dearest are buying homes, starting businesses, tying the knot and having babies. there are multiple loved ones who have had huge birthdays – 30, 40 and 60. being able to celebrate with my friends and family is not something i take for granted. this made ringing in my mom’s 60th that much more special.
mommy + me
all my mom knew was that she wanted all of her favorite people in one place with good food, drinks flowing and dancing all night. we were definitely able to pull that off. it was nostalgic to have her party in the city she grew up in (quite literally down the street from where my grandfather still lives). as people poured in, there were friends from each place she worked, elementary, middle and high school, extended family members from oklahoma, friends of mine she has taken in as her own and of course, our immediate family.
papa + his girls
it meant the world to my mom and i to see my aunt and cousin walk in with papa (my grandfather). as we watch those that we love age, seeing them be able to celebrate means more than it ever did before. it was the sweetest seeing my mom’s friends (many of whom she’s known since 6th grade) run up to papa, embrace him and reminisce about the kind of home he and grammy built – one where everyone was welcomed. the memories made there have truly stood the test of time.
yvonne (my godmother), sheila, my mom and linda (my mom’s oldest friend 🤎)
my godmother and valentina (not pictured) were quick to contact me months before my mom’s birthday to ask how they could help me. from running errands in la i wouldn’t be able to do from the bay to helping with florals and setup, it truly couldn’t have happened without them. my godmother and mom honestly function more like sisters. linda and my mom had not seen each other since each of their 50th birthdays. watching them embrace brought tears to my eyes – it was like no time had passed. i know witnessing the way my mom and grandmother approached friendship over the years set the tone for how i approach mine – friends are truly your chosen family. seeing my mom’s friends show up for her by the dozen reiterated just that.
my godsister + me
it should come as no surprise that my godmother raised an amazing daughter. my godsister has pretty much been a built in best friend since birth. knowing i could count on her to help make my mom’s party special really took some of the pressure off and made it so much easier to enjoy the evening later on. i think the bartender would agree.
reens, mom, me + sam
when reens and sam not only agreed to do the balloon arch but to come down early to help set up to make the night a success, we were overjoyed. any time spent with them is the absolute best – whether we are in sweats on the sofa, exploring a new place, toasting at a boozy brunch or celebrating milestones together. they are those friends that consistently meet us where we are and we are so grateful for them.
anthony + me
anthony hands probably still smell like citrus after chopping hundreds of lemon and lime wedges for the bar. the irony? anthony doesn’t even drink. truly a testament of what you do for those you love. anthony and my mom have really the sweetest connection. she has always loved how powerful anthony is with a pen. my mom still speaks fondly about something he wrote when we were in undergrad. it was special to have him be there to help her celebrate.
pooh bear + me
my brother had been driving me crazy in the months leading up to my mom’s party. i am sure if you ask him, he would say the same thing about me. the wild thing about music is it’s ability to bring people together. the second we heard “wipe me down” by boosie, our eyes locked, we hashed it out on the dance floor, had the dj run it back and put on the remix (the only version worth listening to). men – if you don’t have a velvet shirt for fall/winter, go buy one immediately. pooh bear was an entire mood.
me, reens, ram ram + my godsister
you know it is a good party when your legs and feet are aching from dancing and your ribs and face are hurting from nonstop laughter and smiling. that is ALWAYS how i feel after night spent out with these three. while i love my nights in with each of them, the nights out are just as invigorating in a different way. the way each of them love my mom and me? unparalleled.
nick, mom, me + melissa
both nick and melissa are friends of mine my mom has adopted in the last five years. nick’s mom and my mom are birthday twins so the party being the day before both of their birthdays worked out wonderfully. melissa and my mom already loved one another but are trauma bonded after my covid stint a couple of years ago. it felt so good to be together for something celebratory with all of us in good health.
sam, reens, me, alexz + hashim
i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again – the connections i made while working at the dealership were truly the best of any place i’ve ever worked. there has never been a workplace where i’ve been able to show up completely unfiltered and have nearly every person around me doing the exact same thing. my little bay babies came through and elevated the night with their energy (especially when anything by e40, too short or mac dre was on).
cheers!
there were more trips than i could count made to the bar to toast to/with the birthday girl. the night was exactly what i wanted for my mom – filled with limitless love and laughter. it is incredibly special to watch my mom step into 60 as the most confident, unapologetic and beautiful (both inside and out) version of herself. i truly think this will be her best decade yet.
cheers to another trip around the sun, mama bear. i love you so much!
between the laughter and tears of joy at my 33rd birthday celebration, i took a moment to speak to my family + friends who were present to express my deep sense of gratitude. without question, my love languages are quality time and acts of service. walking into a room full of people i love with my entire heart nearly knocked the wind out of me. once i gathered myself, i spoke about how each person was present for a reason, one being the reciprocity between us. sometimes, i think it is easy to take reciprocal relationships for granted. i certainly don’t at this stage in my life. it was beautiful to witness my people simply showing up for me.
“i love when someone shows up for you in the same way you do for them…that’s rare.”
in seeing this quote, i am fortunate that many people come to mind. someone who consistently knocks it out of the park is jaclyn. we’ve known each other for 15 years this fall. from living in the same dorm to working in psych research labs to being roommates after college to working together in residence life while in the same grad school program to being present for every major life event (graduations, weddings, big moves, funerals, birth of children, etc.) and now, both being therapists – jaclyn has ALWAYS had both the ability and the willingness to meet me exactly where i am. the added bonus of being in jaclyn’s life? being welcomed into her family as if they were my very own. we have grown closer even while our lives have been more full than what we knew we could each handle. somehow, we manage to fill one another’s cups. it is rare and i am grateful beyond belief.
jaclyn + i at her wedding in july ‘16
happy birthday, jaclyn. thank you for modeling that it is in fact possible to have it all – family, friends, health and wellness, an amazing private practice and so much more. i admire and love you more than i could ever describe. cheers to 33.
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