things have been fucking weird over the last couple of weeks here in la (and worldwide, la was just late to the party) due to covid-19.  so weird in fact that i could not pinpoint why i felt a shift this morning when i woke up.  i felt the need to extend myself to others in this time of complete confusion and chaos.  after dropping off my rent check in their mailbox this morning, a small gesture i thought i could offer was letting my landlords (an elderly couple) know that i would be happy to run any errands they needed while i am working from home to avoid them leaving their cute home in pasadena.

since i was already out, i indulged and swung by the starbucks drive thru to get a venti iced chai with soy and an added espresso shot.  the sweet guy at the register complimented my braids and i thanked him.  as i reached to grab my phone for him to scan, i caught a glimpse of the tattoo on my arm.  i read and reread the roman numerals.  then i realized what day it was. march 22.

today marks 18 years since my uncle passed.  i only had one that i got the opportunity to know (my dad’s brother passed when i was a baby) so uncle melvin or “squeaky” as we called him, was everything to me.  i trusted him fully. we belly laughed together regularly.  i still stop whatever i am doing to watch the green mile whenever it is on tv because we watched it together more times than i could count.

he had the biggest heart and was always looking for ways, both big and small, to help others.  with the current state of our world, we should all follow suit (to the best of our abilities).  this quote made me think of him…

“when we lose someone we love we must learn not to live without them, but to live with the love they left behind.”

i am currently jamming out to maze and frankie beverly (one of his favorite groups) and thinking of other ways i can continue to honor his legacy moving forward.

today, without even knowing what day it was initially, i lived with the love he left behind.

how do you live with the love your loved ones have left behind?  i would love to hear about it.

xoxo,

k. tap