this year has been full of milestones – many of my nearest and dearest are buying homes, starting businesses, tying the knot and having babies. there are multiple loved ones who have had huge birthdays – 30, 40 and 60. being able to celebrate with my friends and family is not something i take for granted. this made ringing in my mom’s 60th that much more special.

all my mom knew was that she wanted all of her favorite people in one place with good food, drinks flowing and dancing all night. we were definitely able to pull that off. it was nostalgic to have her party in the city she grew up in (quite literally down the street from where my grandfather still lives). as people poured in, there were friends from each place she worked, elementary, middle and high school, extended family members from oklahoma, friends of mine she has taken in as her own and of course, our immediate family.

it meant the world to my mom and i to see my aunt and cousin walk in with papa (my grandfather). as we watch those that we love age, seeing them be able to celebrate means more than it ever did before. it was the sweetest seeing my mom’s friends (many of whom she’s known since 6th grade) run up to papa, embrace him and reminisce about the kind of home he and grammy built – one where everyone was welcomed. the memories made there have truly stood the test of time.

my godmother and valentina (not pictured) were quick to contact me months before my mom’s birthday to ask how they could help me. from running errands in la i wouldn’t be able to do from the bay to helping with florals and setup, it truly couldn’t have happened without them. my godmother and mom honestly function more like sisters. linda and my mom had not seen each other since each of their 50th birthdays. watching them embrace brought tears to my eyes – it was like no time had passed. i know witnessing the way my mom and grandmother approached friendship over the years set the tone for how i approach mine – friends are truly your chosen family. seeing my mom’s friends show up for her by the dozen reiterated just that.

it should come as no surprise that my godmother raised an amazing daughter. my godsister has pretty much been a built in best friend since birth. knowing i could count on her to help make my mom’s party special really took some of the pressure off and made it so much easier to enjoy the evening later on. i think the bartender would agree.

when reens and sam not only agreed to do the balloon arch but to come down early to help set up to make the night a success, we were overjoyed. any time spent with them is the absolute best – whether we are in sweats on the sofa, exploring a new place, toasting at a boozy brunch or celebrating milestones together. they are those friends that consistently meet us where we are and we are so grateful for them.

anthony hands probably still smell like citrus after chopping hundreds of lemon and lime wedges for the bar. the irony? anthony doesn’t even drink. truly a testament of what you do for those you love. anthony and my mom have really the sweetest connection. she has always loved how powerful anthony is with a pen. my mom still speaks fondly about something he wrote when we were in undergrad. it was special to have him be there to help her celebrate.

my brother had been driving me crazy in the months leading up to my mom’s party. i am sure if you ask him, he would say the same thing about me. the wild thing about music is it’s ability to bring people together. the second we heard “wipe me down” by boosie, our eyes locked, we hashed it out on the dance floor, had the dj run it back and put on the remix (the only version worth listening to). men – if you don’t have a velvet shirt for fall/winter, go buy one immediately. pooh bear was an entire mood.

you know it is a good party when your legs and feet are aching from dancing and your ribs and face are hurting from nonstop laughter and smiling. that is ALWAYS how i feel after night spent out with these three. while i love my nights in with each of them, the nights out are just as invigorating in a different way. the way each of them love my mom and me? unparalleled.

both nick and melissa are friends of mine my mom has adopted in the last five years. nick’s mom and my mom are birthday twins so the party being the day before both of their birthdays worked out wonderfully. melissa and my mom already loved one another but are trauma bonded after my covid stint a couple of years ago. it felt so good to be together for something celebratory with all of us in good health.

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again – the connections i made while working at the dealership were truly the best of any place i’ve ever worked. there has never been a workplace where i’ve been able to show up completely unfiltered and have nearly every person around me doing the exact same thing. my little bay babies came through and elevated the night with their energy (especially when anything by e40, too short or mac dre was on).

there were more trips than i could count made to the bar to toast to/with the birthday girl. the night was exactly what i wanted for my mom – filled with limitless love and laughter. it is incredibly special to watch my mom step into 60 as the most confident, unapologetic and beautiful (both inside and out) version of herself. i truly think this will be her best decade yet.

cheers to another trip around the sun, mama bear. i love you so much!

xoxo,

k. tap