hey there! i know many of you are adjusting to working from home like i am while we are quarantined due to the shelter in place order. something i noticed were my eyes being super sore or having headaches far more frequently than what i am used to. this was even happening after getting enough rest and being properly hydrated. i was baffled.
flash forward to a couple of conversations with friends from college and i had my answer: i am not used to working behind a screen all day. as someone that works as a counselor, the bulk of my work is done face to face. i might spend an hour a day on emails and client notes but the bulk of my day is spent looking at faces and body language, not a computer screen. i hadn’t considered the impact of the blue light on my vision.
not only have the headaches and sore eyes gone away, but i am absolutely obsessed with how cute these are. they have a few different styles but i was aiming for something neutral, durable and stylish. and for just $40 from nordstrom, i couldn’t say no. plus, whenever i can rack up points to get a new nordstrom note, i do.
once we are back in the office, i will likely get a pair to keep at my desk. i have found myself using them even when blogging just to have a layer of protection/separation between my eyes and the screens i spend so much time looking at on a day to day basis.
i don’t know how i went so long without these! they surely would’ve come in handy while in grad school. but now, with me working from home, i couldn’t live without these.
i wish i could tell you that “gucci gang” by lil’ pump wasn’t a song that got stuck in my head more times than i could count but that would be a lie. it is just too damn catchy and is short enough to want to play it on loop a few times.
while i have my fair share of great leather handbags, i did not have any high end leather wallets or cardholders. somehow, anjelica and aaron always seem to know just what i need for my birthday. for my 30th, one of the the items they gifted me was this stunning emerald green gucci card case.
one of the funny things about this was that anj was sure about the color choice but aaron was surprised. i think oftentimes, people do not realize that green is my favorite color. i don’t wear a lot of green but it is a color i find to be so aesthetically pleasing. lucky for you, if green is not your cup of tea, this gucci card case also comes in hibiscus red, nero (black) and porcelain rose (a deep blush). all of them have the double g hardware in a warm gold.
it is sleek, chic and holds all of your essentials. for me, that’s my driver license, a credit card, my insurance card, my nordstrom card (i could never leave home without it) and a small slit in the middle for a few bills.
and as if this wasn’t already a fantastic gift (along with some great makeup items i cannot wait to post about when i actually have somewhere to go), the best gift they gave me was telling me i would be an aunt to their first born this september. my hope is that anjelica will write all about it on her blog for all of you mothers and mamas to be out there.
i cannot wait to use this in place of my bulky wallet, especially when carrying smaller handbags/clutches.
before covid-19 quarantine was in full swing, i was in the bay area earlier this month and had dinner with two girlfriends. i had not seen one of them at all in 2020 and she brought my birthday gift bag to dinner. while i loved each item, my favorite was the pair of statement studs from target by the brand: a new day.
for years, i was a huge fan of dangling earrings. then, when i was in grad school and balancing multiple jobs in various environments, including working with kids, i realized studs were the way to go for me unless it was a special occasion. sometimes, they felt a bit boring or just blah. once i found fun studs like these, it made me feel a bit more excited about my look, especially when my hair is pulled off my face (slash thrown into a messy bun/top knot).
what i love is that these earrings are nickel free so i know my ears will not be agitated. another great thing is that this beautiful pair was just under $10! you really cannot beat that. while the selection may vary by store, i have linked my favorite pairs from this particular brand at target if you want to order online (and avoid stores to flatten the curve):
this post is long overdue but i now feel like it will be more thorough as i have ordered more and more products as the months have gone on.
in september, i placed my first order with skims. Â i had a wedding to attend in october where i had plans on wearing a gown with a thigh high slit and figured the solution short would be just what i needed if i still wanted to smoothing/shaping everywhere else. Â sweater season was soon approaching and i have some with v backs/off the should situations and figured this would be the perfect time to try the scoop neck bra and mesh triangle bralette. Â while i ended up going with a different gown so i could dance more at the wedding without fear of exposing my undergarments to the guests, both the scoop neck bra and mesh triangle bralette have gotten plenty of good use. Â they feel buttery against the skin, stay in place and are more comfortable than an actual bra while giving good lift/support.
after that successful first order, i started thinking about what i would be wearing off my 30th birthday celebration in vegas. Â while five options were purchased for the three events in the event that something did not thrill me once there, two of them were items where it would be impossible to wear a bra. Â i knew i would be doing plenty of dancing and moving around and wanted the girls to stay in place. Â enter: skims pasties and body tape. Â not only did it work like a charm, i was wildly impressed with the color options and how closely smokey quartz matched my actual skin tone. Â even with hours of drinking and dancing, when i was removing the pasties and body tape at nearly 5am, the adhesive was just as strong as it had been when applied.
my most recent purchase was the long sleeved black crew neck bodysuit and i am honestly just waiting for the right date/girls night out to wear it. Â it holds me in the right places and accentuates the things i want highlighted.
there really is not enough shape wear out there that is all inclusive in terms of color options and sizing. Â skims hits the nails on the head for both. Â while all three of my orders have been placed directly through skims.com, the line is now also available at nordstrom. Â if you are a card member like me that likes to rack up those points to get a nordstrom note, you know this is a game changer.
do you have any skims products you love? Â anything you have questions about? Â let me know.
i have been trying to write this post for almost a week but really wanted to make sure i did it justice. Â it needs to be detailed, informative, provide tips/connections, full of gratitude and just fun. Â all of that requires energy i did not have prior to waking up this morning in boston so here we are.
first things first: if you know me, you know i love birthdays. Â turning 30 was an incredibly huge deal to me. Â so huge that i started discussing plans shortly after my 29th birthday. Â by june 13th (yes, a full eight months before my 30th birthday), i sent out an aggressively detailed paperless post. Â it had dates, a location and polls for the guests to vote on re: what hotel to stay in. Â i wanted a firm rsvp sooner rather than later but when coordinating what ended up being close to 40 people over a 72 hour period, that was tougher than anticipated. Â if i could do it all over again, i would definitely hire a day of/week of coordinator. Â if i had a dollar for the number of text messages i received leading up to the event that could be found in either the paperless post or one of the group strands i sent (broken down by night so no one had to suffer with being on a strand that had nothing to do with them), i could easily pay my rent for next month without touching my checking account. Â even though it was tough to coordinate that many people, each person i invited was someone i wanted there because they played a role in me becoming who i am today.
the rundown:
my friends reens and sam flew into lax on wednesday night (the 12th) so i was able to pop a bottle of champagne at 12:01am with them on the 13th. Â i went to work that day and when i got home, they loaded up my car and we went to go swoop up my mom and the largest suv ever to take to vegas. Â the four of us drove to my aunt’s house (on the way to vegas) to pick her up and continued on our journey. Â we checked into the mgm signature thursday night and reens and sam decorated my hotel suite. Â they did not leave until 4am and i did not go to bed until nearly 6am. Â it was worth it. Â the suite was ready for action – fully decorated, a stocked fridge and the most delicious cupcakes baked by my dear friend, genevieve. Â if you are in the la area, contact her.
people really started arriving on friday. Â i decided that each night, i would host a pregame starting at 9pm both so people could get a buzz on and actually be able to have conversations to get to reconnect or meet one another before we were in a club with music so loud that it was thumping in our chests. Â that night, we went to this newer club at park mgm: on the record. Â it was smaller, intimate and predominantly hip hop based. Â it was the perfect way to kick off the weekend. Â the marquee was such a sweet touch.
saturday, more people arrived and i knew this night would be absolutely nuts because my mom, godmother, aunt sheila and aunt tannisha would all be joining us out. Â we ended up going to omnia, and more specifically, the hip hop room. Â it was a tight fit for 30 people but it was truly a blast and we made it work. Â everyone’s feet were in pain the next day because there was non stop dancing and screaming song lyrics while slamming shots. Â truly a sight to be seen. Â and of course, my mom wanted us to arrive as one so we took a party bus there. Â she is the best. Â also, i tend to feel like in the years since my grandmother passed, she finds a way to show up at each of my birthdays. Â this weekend, it was in the form of bottle service girls wearing her absolute favorite color – purple.
somehow, sunday ended up being both my favorite day/night and seemingly, the guests favorite as well. Â i kicked off the day with a quick solo coffee date with marilena (since we had not seen each other since august) followed by a group brunch with about 15 of us at the only buffet i will willingly go to – the buffet at aria. Â i like that they commit to not just bottomless mimosas, but bottomless drinks. Â they also have a great seafood bar and truly have something for everyone, no matter your dietary restrictions. Â after that, i came back and caught up with some of the girls before heading to my makeup appointment at the mac at miracle mile courtesy of my friend leighia. Â if you are ever in vegas, be sure to call ahead to request mike. Â his ability to work with black skin really impressed me.
i was able to come back, take a bath and pregame and give a heartfelt toast to my guests to thank them for coming and let them know what their presence meant to me. Â it was a wonderful way to kick off the night.
now, when jason told me sunday would be one for the books, i don’t think i understood the magnitude. Â my mom paid for another party bus since she kept winning at the venetian and rode the bus to drop us off at the club. Â once we arrived at drais, it all started to make sense. Â not only did we have the best table in the house with a perfect view of the stage (which would come in handy when keyshia cole performed), my face was literally everywhere. Â from being screened onto our bottle service tables to being on fatheads carried in by our bottle service girls to being on every screen in the club, it was very clear that my 30th birthday was being celebrated. Â initially, i think i found it to be a bit overwhelming and i was more or less in shock. Â then, i snapped out of it. Â i thought to myself if i am typically doing this to celebrate others whether it be for a birthday, a graduation, a wedding, etc., i should allow others to be just as excited to celebrate me. Â when we left the club that night, everyone had sore feet, raspy voices and full hearts. Â there was also something incredibly special about being able to ring in my 30th with my little brother, pooh bear. Â we have lived in different places for more than 10 years so being in la at the same time and him being able to come to vegas meant the world to me. Â i don’t know if i would ever be able to replicate that night.
after drais, five or six of us gathered in my room and i made bagels and drinks for everyone and just recapped the night. Â it was the best.
on monday, people left at a variety of times ranging from 6am to 11pm. Â a true testament to how people that love you will move mountains to show up for you.
now, you know i would not leave you without some useful information in the event you do something on this scale for your next birthday or event.
here are some tips:
even if you feel like you are being annoying, firm up your head count at least 60 days before the event
let your guests know (if money is involved) that their head is not counted until money is received (i typically am firm about this and was a bit looser this trip and took people at their word – it bit me in the ass in a variety of ways from people trying to change plans at the last minute with no consideration for the money already spent/contracts signed + me reaching the maximum amount you can transfer on venmo in one week and having to spend hundreds of dollars to withdraw my own money from vegas atm machines)
have someone on the ground of where you plan on going/celebrating that is going to celebrate you the way you would celebrate your very best friend. Â at this point, i think both my mom and my brother would adopt jason rose into their homes after the phenomenal time they had on both saturday at omnia and sunday at drais (truly some next level shit – my brother was blown away and he is hard to get excited about anything)
give people time to recover from each event – i had an event each night (friday, saturday and sunday) but my only daytime event was a late brunch on sunday (at 1pm) that was optional. Â for the nighttime events, i just had people tell me what they wanted to attend. Â maybe there was a night that worked better for them than others or perhaps they had a favorite club in vegas and based it on that. Â either way, people were typically rested by the time we went out at night because the days were not stacked with events
be sure the guest list is visible to all attendees. Â i say this because i personally hate surprises. Â just because you are friends with all of these people does not mean they are all friends with each other. Â whether it be exes, ex best friends or whatever the case may be, it is better when people know exactly what (and who) they are walking into.
now, for the final piece…
gratitude – the state of being grateful: thankfulness.
i truly could not be more appreciative of each person who received an invitation and took the time and money to plan to come out to vegas to make my 30th birthday one for the books. Â outside of jason (who literally is the promoter you should use for all things vegas), there was only one friend who attended who lives in vegas. Â that means every other person had to book a flight or road trip in. Â i literally had to reference my spreadsheet to be sure i did not miss anyone but here it goes:
a big thank you to michelle, rebecca, kennie, amanda, taylor, marilena, jared, victoria, z, alan, pooh bear, tannisha, hilly, leighia, michael, michael c., michael t., sam g., godmother, auntie sheila, jess, jon, april, gio, liz, jason, vana, cortney, whitney, teki, theo, makensy, melissa and marc. Â it would not have been the same without you.
and a special thank you to my mom, reens, sam and alexz for literally helping me get everything together and for keeping me sane throughout the weekend.
and jason, you are one of a kind. Â i will never do another vegas trip without you. Â thank you for helping me coordinate sheer madness. Â let’s do it again sometime.
to all of you who reached out with a thoughtful text, card, gift or surprise in my hotel suite, i truly appreciate it more than you know.
30 already feels better than 29 in more ways that one.
xoxo,
k. tap
p.s. i know i am still missing pictures from this weekend so if you are holding out, send them over!
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